Saturday, December 16, 2006
Cool update on this story: Former bride-to-be and her boyfriend could not cancel their wedding cake on such short notice. So they are bringing it to church on Sunday for the coffee time after the worship service. I've heard of a birthday cake for Jesus, but never a wedding cake for the birth of Christ! They are handling this with such grace -- it is pretty neat to watch...
I was scheduled to officiate at a wedding on December 23rd. The bride is a 21-year-old college student. Her beloved is an army medic who will likely head to Afghanistan in March for an extended tour. The just decided three weeks ago that they want to get married while he is on leave during Christmas break.
Her mother called me this afternoon to tell me they were calling off the wedding. The bride called me herself a few minutes ago. I am so proud of her.
Self-serving story warning...
I graduated from college at 20 and married two weeks later. Needless to say, I left him after an extremely brief marriage and were we divorced by the time I was 22. After many hours of therapy, I realized that most of my peers would have just lived with their boyfriend and wouldn't have considered marriage at such a young age. But a good, Christian, seminary-bound girl like me saw marriage as the ONLY option. I can remember walking down the aisle at the First Presbyterian Church and knowing that it would be my "first" wedding. Smart girl, bad decision. The second (and final) time I got married, I had no such doubts.
So I am full of sadness and admiration for this young woman in my congregation. It takes a brave person to say, "Wait. This might be embarrassing, but I know this is the right decision." Say a little prayer for her, and for her mother (who happened to have spent thousands of dollars on dresses within the last week. ) And may God close the mouth of anyone who says anything rude like, "But I already bought them a gift!" HUSH.
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And I had the most beautiful bride.
o.k., i'm officiating at a wedding on the 27th for a dear clergy woman friend of mine (who's eloping to our small town- gotta love it!) to a member of the military who will be home for two weeks on leave. its a wee bit different. they're both in their forties... but your story makes me wonder how many weddings like this will take place (or not- as the case may be) in the next two weeks.
i was supposed to do a wedding on the 30th, but it has been postponed. perhaps you read about the catholic drama awhile back... the drama continues.
good for this bride. so, am i reading the italics right? that's a story about you? wow.
Good for her! It can be a hard thing in the midst of the pre-wedding insanity and pressure to stop and call it off...but I'm glad I did.
(And I'm marrying a lovely lady after Christmas this year.)
(BTW, Alex, were you in UMin in Tucson in the mid 90's? You look familiar. I was a grad student in entomology in 1995-96 and many adventures later was ordained at Trinity in 2004.)